Donna
by gabrielaov07
Summary: What is inside Donna's head on a cold monday morning?


Hi! This is my first story ever. Is a short one shot! Hope you like it. Please leave your feedback and comments to keep improving.

Thanks in advance for reading! :)

**Donna**

Black, two sugars, splash of vanilla, she ordered on that Monday morning at her favorite coffee shop before going to the firm...

It was a cold morning but at that point, the cold weather and the wind were nothing but a good distraction of her emotions that were killing her inside!

She is the one that always has an answer for everything and everyone! The one that actually makes things happen at the firm... the one that people trust to share their feelings... the one that keeps all in its place! But, "who is there for me?!", she asked herself.

She manages to be so unapologetic, so confident and so powerful in front of everybody, but the truth is, she also has insecurities, and during this particular morning, all her emotions are playing with her heart and her mind.

Tall americano with two sugars and vanilla for Donna, the barista shout out, interrupting her thoughts.

"Yes, here!" She said. "Thank you".

"You're welcome, Ms. Paulsen", the barista said. "Have a wonderful week,'' he added.

She smiled and left the coffee shop quickly.

She hesitated between taking a cab or walk... but she decided to walk to clear her mind a little bit.

She doesn't understand why is she feeling like this lately... like something is missing in her life! Like she is incomplete... truth is, she is feeling lonely! And it's hard to accept it out loud when in front of everybody she seems so empowered. But part of being a strong woman is acknowledge her feelings and insecurities.

.

.

It's 7:00am at the firm and she is already at her desk, sipping her coffee, putting everything in order on her week planner and reviewing some documents.

Harvey arrives early to work on a case and passes by her office, he is surprised that she is there so early.

"Donna?", he called her.

"Harvey!", she respond.

"What are you doing here so early?!", he replied.

"I work here, Harvey!", she rolled her eyes.

* Harvey rolled his eyes too *

"As COO I have a lot of to take care of, so I decided to come early this morning to have everything in order for the rest of the week", she added.

"See, that's an answer!", Harvey said and continued his walk to his own office.

Donna just smirk and looked down over her planner.

She prefers to be concentrated on her work than on her feelings...

Everyday is getting harder to work side by side with the man she is in love with but that isn't prepared to love her back. she needs more! She wants more! And maybe she is ready to ask for it. She is ready to try to get it one last time!

She is pretty sure that Harvey felt something when they kissed! And not just a simple physical reaction... she knows that he felt more.

Give me what I want or I'll take it for myself she listened on the song that is playing on her phone, and she smiles at the irony of her current feelings and the casualty of the lyrics.

.

.

.

The day passes by without any major inconvenient.

Focus on her job truly helps her to forget about how she's feeling inside.

.

.

.

It's 8:00pm already and without even realizing, she has spent more than 13 hours at the firm. She can continue... at the end, there are still a lot of things to do.

Harvey is heading to his apartment when he realizes that she is still there.

He stood in the entrance of her office and looks at her... she is typing, with a half empty glass of scotch by her side. She is so concentrated that she hasn't even noticed he is looking at her.

He just smiles... and suddenly she looks up and find him, looking at her.

"Hey", he says.

"Hey,'' she replied with a soft smile.

"You are kind of a workaholic lately,'' he said.

"I am Donna,'' she answers. "If I want to keep that not just as a name but also as a title, I have to be on top of everything,'' added with a smile.

* Harvey nods and smiles *

"Can I join you on that drink?", he asked.

She doubted for a minute and said: "What do you say if instead of having drinks here, we go out?"

"Good for me", he said. "I will wait for you in the lobby. Ray is already there".

* She nods *

She just finishes her drink, send the last email of the night, packs her things and heads to the elevator.

She is wondering why she asked him to go out?! These types of things are the ones that do not help her to heal. That do not help her to move on.. that do not make her forget about Harvey as a possibility of something more than a friend.

The sound of the elevator interrupts her thoughts.

She appears at the lobby and Harvey is there waiting for her. He receives her with a soft smile.

"God, I hate when he smiles at me that way,'' she said to herself.

After all, he is her weakness. Her soft point.

She just smiled back and met him a couple of steps later.

"Same place as always?", he asked.

"It's fine for me,'' she says.

They walked out of the building and Ray is waiting for them.

They arrived at their usual bar and start drinking some scotch.

One drink leads to another and suddenly they are feeling drunk and everything they said is 10 times funnier than usual.

They are making jokes about Louis and the random things that he likes. Cats, muds prunie!

Suddenly it hits her... they are perfect co workers and great friends... they ALMOST have everything but she wants more and that realization leads her to say something that she would have never said to him sober... "I love you Harvey, and not just a friend or a 12 years partner"

He is surprised! He didn't see this coming.

He is feeling a little overwhelmed with the revelation but looks directly at her eyes and then at her lips and they kiss... soft and calm. There's no rush... there's no pressure.. it's just they, together at the bar on that late monday night!

She loves the feeling of having his lips over hers but she knows that all of this is because of the alcohol.

He doesn't love her. At least not the way she would like. She knows he loves her as her 12 years friend and as her 12 years companion.

She breaks the kiss. Harvey is confuses and looks at her.

She is confused too but add: "This is not good Harvey, I should go".

She grabs her purse and runs out of the bar.

Her apartment is near, so she decides to walk instead of taking a cab.

Tears over her cheeks... she shouldn't have done that.

She loves her job and after this, everything is going to be uncomfortable.

But she needed to let everything out one last time, as her last try to close this cycle of angst and uncertainty. For good or for bad, what it's done, it's done.

The cold outside hits her even harder now.

She arrived at her apartment not knowing what to do or how to feel.

She takes a hot shower and right after that she went to bed.

She wants to call him. She wants to text him... to tell him... to lie to him and say that everything was just because of the alcohol.

But she knows is better not to.

Maybe he is mad at her. Maybe they would never be back to the way they were before.

No more casual flirting.. no more drinks at night. No more of all those things that used to blur the lines between a friendship and a relationship.

She doesn't know at what time she falls asleep. But the next morning she wakes up at 5:30am. She is feeling a little hangover and a little too sad because of the uncertain day that awaits for her...

She takes a bath and starts to get ready for work. She wants to arrive early to not find Harvey at the elevators. She wants to avoid any possible unnecessary contact with him.

Is almost ready when someone knocks at her door.

She doesn't know who can be.

It's just 7:00am. Really early for visits.

She is almost ready to go but is still barefoot on the carpet and doesn't have any makeup on.

She hopes that is just someone from the maintenance department of the building giving her the exact day they would be working on her bathroom.

She is focusing on that but when she opens the door...

"Harvey?! What are you doing her?!"

She is extremely surprised to find him there.

"Donna?" He said smiling.

"I brought you this..". and hands her a big cup of coffee with a subtle smell of vanilla.

"I think after the drinks we had last night, you might need it".

She smiles while she feels her heart starting to warm.

She feels peace. Maybe he doesn't remember what happened and everything is going back to normal. Whatever normal is for them.

Maybe is his way to say to her that he is not mad at her and that they can keep being friends.

This time, if he doesn't acknowledge his feelings, she is willing to move on on this part of her life... she wants to make peace with these feelings that have been torturing over the years.

She finally understood that some people are meant to be soulmates but just in a friends way.

"Thanks, Harvey,'' she replied with a soft smile.

"Do you want to come in?", she adds.

"No, Donna. I will come back later. Maybe tonight if you let me".

She is confused.

When he is about to leave, he says: "For the record, I love you too. And you look beautiful just the way you are right now".

He leans to kiss her on the cheek and leaves.

Donna is blushed and stumbling.

She doesn't know what to say or what to think.

She is on her door... barefoot... coffee in hand.. just looking at Harvey that is leaving the corridor.

She is cold outside but her feelings are starting to warm her... her cheeks are blushed!

Maybe this time was a good idea to take the risk... maybe now is their turn to have their long lasting story..

Maybe... just maybe... their happy ending Is coming to meet them now. Because even if she doesn't need him to continue with her life, she wants him as her forever partner in crime at work and mostly at home.


End file.
